The Blushing Red Carpet: Salma Hayek FLUSHED

I'll cut right to the chase.

Using Antonio Banderas as a distraction.

What do you think of her dress?

You: ---(comment below!)

Me: 

 "I hate it. I hate the leathery shimmer, I hate the leather feel, I hate the whole leather dress. I don't like that length on her at all. It makes her legs look on the bigger side when I know perfectly well they are NOT. Well, okay, my brother just said the last part. But I agree with him this time. Yes, I do. I HATE it."

If anyone ever forces me to choose between her Gucci dress and my highly irritating, pain-in-the-butt(literally. I was six. A painful age) fear of injections, I'd choose to take saline. Yes, that's how much I hate her dress. It's uncalled for, of course. I don't have any personal vendetta against leather. Call it horrible or chic or sexy, but I LOVE leather tights. I think they look very Gal Gadot. ;) Of course, they'd never do on my legs. Ha. I think my thighs are the size of three Gal Gadot thighs put together.

Did that just sound horribly wrong? 

Still, I wear them. I suppose that's what Salma Hayek thought. (At least, that's the only possible explanation I can think of.) "Hmmm...I hate it. But it's leather. And I LOVE leather. Everyone knows that...." --

Case I: 

Of course, it's two sizes smaller. I did that on PURPOSE. Duh. 

Case II:

If you were wearing what I was, you'd have the same expression, buddy. 

Well, Salma, you poor dear, I definitely understand your predicament. I'd have the same expression too. What I didn't understand was your expression here:

Happy, sulty expression.

What's with THAT? Happy expression much? Oh, well. I hope it was just for the cameras...

However, what I did love was your lovely flower shrug. (But it was still a little odd to see you wear that in the heat.) In fact, that should earn you some brownie points. THAT and the shoes. Still. It doesn't cut down your negative points. Much. 

Here are a few similar designs. I would suggest you wear it in the winters though. Otherwise you might end up with an expression like the CASE II picture and then melt away like warm, green goo. I didn't find that many as expected. The store people apparently thought that winter closet belonged to the winter store. Apparently. They clearly haven't met Salma Hayek...

The first one is bang-on similar (with a better colour, of course). Also, I expect, similar price-tag. If you can afford to, click on the link below the picture:

BHLDN, $1,100

BHLDN, $240

BHLDN, $350

80s PURPLE, $35

Minelli Feather Shrug, $185

Milan Ostrich Feather Stole, $327.07

Streisand Feather Stole, $158.56

Asos, NOW $21.52

Debenhams, $

All I can say right now is...I can't believe I just did a winter wardrobe post. It's 25°C outside. And increasing.

Yours blushingly